


Why Comashipping is a silly name

by Kyarorain



Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon (Anime)
Genre: Crack, Gen, Silly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-09-25
Updated: 2009-09-25
Packaged: 2018-01-10 12:12:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1159605
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kyarorain/pseuds/Kyarorain
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Paul finds himself walking through a hospital, little knowing that at the end of his journey lies a comatose Ash. Sort of one-sided Comashipping.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Why Comashipping is a silly name

**Author's Note:**

> Comashipping is a silly name, yes. It originates from a scene that happens in the Neon Genesis Evangelion movie. The main character is called Shinji and Shinji also happens to be Paul's Japanese name. The particular scene in the movie involves sexual activity and it's so ridiculous that somebody would name a Pokémon shipping after it, that I had to make fun of it.
> 
> Comashipping, for the uneducated, is the pairing of Paul and Ash. I guess this fic could be said to contain one sided Comashipping... sort of.
> 
> This fic is rated M for the suggestion of sexual activity. It doesn't go into any specific detail however. Also contains OOCness... because that was the only way this could be pulled off.
> 
> Game Freak and Nintendo own Pokémon.

Paul was quite unsure what he was doing within this pristine building with its white walls and foul smell that clogged his nostrils and made him almost want to throw up. It was strange that he should find himself within this place for he despised hospitals with a fiery passion. He swore that some strange force had pulled him in here and he had found himself unable to resist it.

"How pathetic," the purple boy muttered to himself, scowling in distaste. His feet seemed to have a mind of their own today. Where was he even going? How silly was it to be walking through this unfamiliar building and not even know where his destination lay? The trainer from Veilstone City had half a mind to turn around and walk right back out. In fact, he wanted to, but those accursed feet just would not listen. "Curse you, feet."

A nurse walking past shot an odd look at Paul, seemingly alarmed at the sight of a young boy talking to his own feet. Paul glared back, daring the nurse to open her mouth and she quickly scuttled away, frightened by his dark, narrow eyes. Paul tended to have that unsettling effect on just about everybody he met, mostly because the unpleased scowl he wore right now was his default expression.

Paul never smiled. He wouldn't smile even if a psychotic madman was holding him at gunpoint and ordering him to smile or die. It seemed Paul didn't have an unfortunate defect that left him with the inability to smile. No, he simply just did not like to do it.

Suddenly, the boy's feet stopped and he turned his head, gazing at a closed door to his right. Paul had the urge to open that door for some unfathomable reason so he reached out and grasped the handle, yanking it downward. With a sharp push, the door opened and Paul stepped through into the room beyond.

What he saw in that room surprised him. A young boy with dark hair lay in the bed, white sheets draped over his body. His eyes were closed and he was hooked up to a machine, plus an IV drip that ran into his arm. Paul realized that he knew him, very well indeed.

This person was none other than Ash Ketchum, whom he considered to be a pathetic trainer. In fact, Paul had whupped his ass several times when it came to Pokémon battles and the closest Ash had ever come to a victory over Paul was when their first ever battle ended in a draw. Paul didn't like Ash very much and whenever they happened to meet, he would either dish out insults toward Ash or ignore him completely.

For some reason, Ash was in a coma. Paul had been quite unaware that Ash was in a coma in the first place and of course had no idea why he even would be. Anyway, he didn't even care about the fact that Ash was in a coma, or so Paul thought. Strange forces were at play; forces that he could not even begin to understand.

Paul's feet were working against him again, bringing him to the side of the bed. He would quite happily have turned around and left the room, while forgetting that the pathetic trainer lay comatose in a hospital bed. "Stop it," he hissed at his feet, "Why are you doing this to me?" Of course, his feet did not respond.

"This is ridiculous." Paul exhaled, wondering if he was going crazy. Here he was, standing over Ash who was in a coma and talking to his feet at the same time. Just how could he have managed to end in a place like this and find his way to where Ash was without even knowing where he was? This experience seemed like a horrible dream.

Paul found himself staring at Ash's peaceful face and a lump formed in his throat. He hastily swallowed, forcing the lump back down his throat. Just where had that come from?

He wasn't sad or anything. No, of course he wasn't sad to see Ash in a coma, that would just be the most ridiculous thing ever. In fact, Paul thought he should be happy to see Ash like this, especially if it meant he wasn't flapping his lips non-stop and trying to get his attention.

So, why were tears rushing to the surface of his eyes? Had he finally completely lost his mind? Yes, that was it. He had snapped and gone insane after years of being an emotional recluse.

"Oh, Ash!" Paul burst out in a passionate voice. A little voice in the back of his mind was screaming at him to regain control of himself and to stop acting like a crazy person, but he paid no heed to it. "Why? Why did this have to happen to you?"

Five minutes passed, in which Paul sobbed frantically, lamenting over the comatose younger boy. Tears leaked out of his long neglected tear ducts, splashing onto the white sheets. "Why?" he screamed again, raising his head to look at the ceiling with an aggrieved expression.

Eventually, Paul quietened down enough that he could hear the machine beeping again. He reached out and seized Ash by the shoulders, frantically shaking his body. "You must wake up! Please, Ash, open your eyes! I beg of you!"

Paul fell silent, trembling with emotion. He clenched his teeth tightly, struggling to keep his emotions in check. "Damn it... why did this have to happen? Why won't you wake up? You have to, Ash!" He reached out and grasped the front of Ash's hospital gown. "Wake up, damn it!"

A loud, ripping noise reached his ears. Paul looked down to see that he had ripped the delicate material and exposed Ash's smooth, bare chest. Now, for some inexplicable reason, he simply could not tear his eyes away from this sight.

What was this strange new feeling that he was experiencing? It was a very odd feeling, one that a boy of his age shouldn't even be having in the first place, and certainly not over someone even younger than he was. What was happening to him? These strange forces were warping his mind, possessing him with the urge to carry out an action that would never, ever be shown in this particular anime in the first place. Even the more mature manga based off a certain franchise would never have sunk so low as to show something so absurd.

So why did Paul want to do it? Heavens only knew, seeing as he shouldn't even have known what it was in the first place. In fact, he didn't and his hands now had a mind of their own. His body was no longer his and he wasn't even sure what he was doing.

Moments later, something unexpected happened. Ash's eyes cracked open. His vision was blurry, so he couldn't even tell what was going on at first. The last thing he remembered was the sound of a loud horn blaring in his ears after crossing the road. In his excitement to reach the gym across the road, he had quite simply forgotten to look both ways. It could happen to anybody, really, plus he didn't see people driving cars very often. How could he have known that at the exact second he started to cross the road a speeding car would come out of nowhere?

Ash blinked rapidly, his vision clearing and he turned his head sideways, his confused gaze falling upon the person at his bedside. Then his face turned bone white and his eyes widened, while his jaw dropped. The sight before him had him paralyzed then and there, frozen to the spot in fear.

What had him terrified was not the fact that Paul had his hands down his own pants, seeing as Ash was too young and innocent to know why anybody would even have their hands down their pants in the first place. He couldn't even begin to think of anything Paul might be doing in his own pants while standing around and doing nothing. Okay, so he could be scratching himself, but that didn't actually require putting his hands inside his pants, did it?

What really had poor Ash scared was the fact that Paul was actually _smiling_.

Ash let rip with a loud scream of terror; so loud that about half of the hospital could hear him screaming. Paul had not realized that Ash was awake and was so startled by the sudden noise that he suffered a heart attack and collapsed to the floor.

Of course, Paul didn't die. He was so horrified by what had happened to him however that he begged to be put in an insane asylum for the rest of his life. It really wasn't so bad having a room with padded walls.

Ash was later discharged from the hospital and resumed his travels with Brock and Dawn. He never did figure out why Paul had his hands down his pants and didn't want to. Every time he tried to think about it, he remembered Paul's smile and suffered minor panic attacks.


End file.
